My real self-concept is generous - I hope.

A generous concept of self is something I've been trying to develop for a while. Today, I can confidently report that a generous concept of self can be great fun when put into practice.

For example, yesterday someone sent me an email about one of our E-books. It seems that the website did not explain what format it was in. Consequently, this person wrote to ask before buying.

What has this got to do with a generous concept of self? Well, as I was writing back a little voice came into my head, "Why don't you send him a free copy for his troubles?".

I had a moment of hesitation, "... but what about the money, this is a quiet time of year?"

"Oh who cares, wouldn't it be a lovely surprise" the generous self responded, pushing the mean self out of the way.

Why am I telling you about this? Because this tiny act of generosity brought such joy.

There is a loving-kindness meditation on Rachel's meditation CD set that has helped her to act more kindly and generously towards herself and others. Click here to get a copy.

What joy can a generous self-concept evoke?

I got an instant response from the recipient of the free E-book and it was clearly full of delight at the unexpected surprise. And I felt my heart sing. It was such a thrill that someone would be happy because of what I did. A generous concept of self produces such good feelings. I never feel like that when I listen to Mrs Mean self.

This isn't the first time I've had joy and delight from allowing a more generous self-concept. For example, when I'm speaking to a large audience I always take Freddo Frog chocolate bars to give out as prizes. I don't need to but I love to do it as many people really like them. This in itself is a hoot!

However, this is only a small part of what happens when a generous concept of self kicks in. Here is the bigger bit.

After the audience has got used to receiving Freddo Frogs, the next time I give someone a reward I suddenly dash out and give a whole handful. It is such a surprise that people squeal with delight and then we all roar with laughter. How's that for a reward just from one tiny act of generosity.

This generous side to my self-concept isn't always there. It doesn't grow naturally all on its own. It meets with opposition. Generosity requires cultivation, just like the flowers in the garden do. And weeds can come in and compete with the flowers too.

Sometimes the weeds even take over. I can feel my heart tighten a little when a generous idea arises, and sometimes it is easier to stay tight than to open my heart. Just like the days when I can't be bothered to weed the garden.

What I find so encouraging is that you and I can work on developing our self-concept and on being more generous, if we want to. Are you a generous person? Am I a generous person? It's up to us what self-concept we have.

Our concept of self does not have to be fixed or rigid. It can be ever flowing, developing and clarifying.

What concept of yourself do you want? A generous one or a tight-fisted one? A kind concept of self or a careful concept of self? A big-hearted one or a stingy one?

Written by Rachel Green.  Professional Speaker | Trainer | Coach | Author.

Rachel is the author of the 2 CD set: "Happy not hassled: Using meditation to manage your emotions". She has used the meditations on these CDs to help her develop a more generous self-concept. Click here to get your copy.

Copyright Confident Woman Australia, 2010.

NB: Any information contained on this site is not provided as an alternative to the obtaining of professional advice from an appropriately qualified practitioner.